Today was a bit of a banner day for "light and momentary troubles." Although lately I've been waking up with some unspoken gnawing worry, today there have been actual faces to my uneasiness. My husband's job has become increasingly unstable. We've watched the pay slowly slip over the last several months, while his hours remain at an all-time high. The economy and the car industry...hmm. This is the baseline of my anxiousness. But then there are the surprises. Today my mom called to let me know my dad believed he had a blood clot or two in his thigh and they were admitting him to the hospital. I am still waiting to hear back from her on what the doppler test showed. But initial words like "This looks big, this doesn't look good..." from the doctor don't exactly build my hope. Then of course while I'm on the phone with my mom, the girls run to inform me that our bunny is on the loose for the 5th time this month. (We may end up having some baby bunnies soon.) And then the icing for me was going to deposit the paycheck tonight and seeing the low $$ number on the receipt. How did our account get so low so quickly...? Oh, I guess the job's lower pay, met with a few unexpected car repair costs and some Christmas shopping collided pretty quickly. I was tempted to cry right then, sitting in the bank parking lot. But, I knew "I've been here before..." Not that all the exact variables have been in place exactly as they felt at that moment, but these troubles are nothing new.
The better part of the day was about twenty minutes ago when I logged on to our church blog, read a recent post by one of our pastors on the prosperity movement, and listened to John Piper speak about why believing God wants his children to have wealth is simply not biblical. My heart swelled with reassurance that the road to heaven we are on is filled with many trials, and I must take up my cross daily in order to live out the salvation Christ has purchased at such a premium cost. I am not to heed the riches of this life, for they are passing away. My life is hidden with God in Christ, and so what I see is not what I get! Thank goodness God rescued me tonight from the downward slope of fretting and having sinful anxiety. I know God will continue to provide in all things...and that His ways are not our ways. Somehow I know my heart is back where it needs to be...looking up to God, and not looking around at the momentary troubles. "I lift my eyes to the hills from where my help comes from. My help comes from the Lord, Maker of Heaven and Earth."
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